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I once took a class at the Leadership Development Institute and they asked everyone to draw a pie chart that depicted the balance in their life between work, family, and community.   Mine looked something like this:

Truth be told, I made a slim slice for community because I was too embarrassed to leave it out entirely.  I mean, I’m relatively good about separating out my recycling–that counts, doesn’t it?  And about once or twice a year, I volunteer to judge science fair projects for elementary and middle schools.  Maybe the slice wasn’t the fib I worried it was.

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m very interested in community service.  I’d like to prepare teenage mothers for the workplace, lift the spirits of the elderly who don’t get enough visits at their nursing home, and help abandon pets find a forever home.  And let’s not forget saving the environment!  The list of things I’d like to do to help others goes on and on.  The problem is failing to narrow down what I care about most.  I have a limited amount of time to dedicate to service outside the family, and picking a cause feels like picking a favorite child, which is to say it feels unnatural.  As we all know, too many options leads to paralysis. 

But there’s another problem too.  There’s no way to increase the share of community without cutting into the resources of work and family.  Most will agree that work section is unbalanced anyway, so cutting back would be beneficial.  And perhaps I can take my family to do service projects with me, achieving two goals at once.

But a friend of mine suggested another way, which goes back to the idea of reframing.   He told me he viewed the time he spent strategizing  and mentoring at work as his service to the office community.  Although many may scoff at the manager who’s “only trying to help,” I can assure you most of the managers I know (and I know many) really do have the best interests of their workplace at heart. 

And that made me feel a lot better.  Who’s to say the office community is any less deserving than another?  Acts of kindness are important no matter where you give.  The leaders who have taken the time to encourage me or help me get in the door of another career opportunity have made a huge impact on my life.   So maybe my pie chart isn’t so bad.  Service isn’t just about solving big problems, but making a difference, occasionally one person at a time.

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12 Responses to Chicken Soup For The Cubicle Soul

    • On
    • March 10, 2010 at 10:25 pm
    • Lucinda Eileen
    • Said...

    Building community is important. And I think it is going to become even more important as things unfold in the near future. However, raising a child well is one of the best things you can do for your community. As Ingrid gets older, she will become involved in school and sports (if I know you at all) and there will be many opportunities to stretch her horizons and benefit the community. Trust me on this. In a few years you will be amazed you ever asked this question. But I also think there are many things you can do at work, which is a community in itself and enmeshed with the larger community. A friend at my old office and I organized an annual blood drive and regularly took collections of clothes and toiletries to the women’s shelter so that they could have good clothes for interviews and education. Others in our office researched and publicized information on recycling and green issues–such as toilet paper and office chemicals –to implement in the building and at home.

  2. Anywhere there are at least two people, there is community. Sometimes “community” gets warped into “human race”, and when that happens a lot of people feel that somehow they are responsible for changing the world for everybody. Or should at least be a part of something that is doing so.

    But you are correct; you office is a community. Your family is one. And while I maintain that if you wanted to you COULD find time to do things for the community at large and still work and raise a family, I don’t believe that you HAVE to.

    There are dozens of literal doors you will walk through each day, and half the time somebody will be right behind you. If half of THOSE times you let them go in first and hold that door for them as they do so, that’s serving the community.

  3. Just visited you via Brazen. You are doing pretty good, yeah, Everyday is indeed bright!

  4. Lucinda- Of course you are right that raising a child well is one of the best ways of serving the community. But sadly my pie chart would have been nearly identical before Ingrid was born. Of course, I also spent several years teaching before Ingrid was born–another form of community service that lasts beyond the moment you give it. I do love the idea of giving to the office community and your ideas are terrific ones.

    Ty- Another terrific idea. If we all just extended the courtesy of holding a door open every time someone came in behind us. I think our world has forgotten the luxury of courtesy in many senses. I think this post may have some of the best comments–these are great ways of looking at community service!

    Neeraj- Thank you so much for stopping by and leaving a comment. This, too, is a community service. :)

    • On
    • March 13, 2010 at 10:56 am
    • Webmonarch
    • Said...

    When I first made it to college, I was also overwhelmed by the calls to service. I ended up choosing one volunteering gig (escorting for my local planned parenthood) not because of the good I was doing (I could help my community in hundreds of ways) but because of the community of escorts. More than any other metric, I have found myself happier in groups which I have chosen not because of their mission, but because of the people dedicated to that mission. The writing is great, thank you,

  6. Webmonarch,
    I love the idea of choosing groups because of the people, not just the mission. You’re right that by using this focus, it helps narrow the choice of where to spend your time. Now that’s an idea I can use! Thanks!
    Jen

    • On
    • March 14, 2010 at 1:09 am
    • Eric
    • Said...

    Jen, there’s nothing to say you can’t “kill two birds with one stone” by turning some community service into a family project. (Or, slightly harder but still doable, a work project.)

    Do it together, and it may even strengthen your family or work relationships while simultaneously helping the community.

    • Eric,
      It’s hard now, since my little girl is still a toddler. It doesn’t preclude the idea all together, but her attention span is still pretty short. But I think the gist of these comments speaks to the idea you are stating: knock two birds with one stone, however it works out, either by serving your office community, by being a better friend, or engaging your family in service activities. Maybe even all three, eh? :)

    • On
    • April 1, 2010 at 12:44 am
    • Fenster
    • Said...

    One of my friends already told me about this place and I do not regret that I found this article.

    • Fenster,

      Glad you like it here and thanks for taking the time to leave a comment. Welcome!

    • On
    • April 15, 2010 at 7:58 pm
    • JonErik
    • Said...

    I would appreciate more visual materials, to make your blog more attractive, but your writing style really compensates it. But there is always place for improvement

    • Jon,

      Actually, I totally agree on the visuals. I’m working on it, which is another way of saying I’m trying to figure out how to add visuals without resorting to stock photos (which I typically don’t like) or becoming a photographer. Right now I’m working full time in addition to doing the blog, so I don’t have as much time as I’d like to make improvements. But I am storing up a lot of ideas, so come July, there should be a big make-over!

      Thanks for commenting and for the compliment on the writing. That means a lot!

      Hope to see you around again!
      Jen