I recently had a feedback session with my Air Force Reserves supervisor that wasn’t entirely rosy.

By and large, he was happy.  But then he turned serious and asked me, “Can you handle some honest feedback?”

I took a deep breath.

He’d noticed that I had the habit of panicking when I felt I had too much work on my plate, and then rashly canceled on my commitments.

I didn’t necessarily disagree.  I knew I had the habit of signing up for too many activities and projects, mainly because I’m easily excited by opportunities to problem solve.  When my to-do list got to be more than I could handle, I re-prioritized and either wrapped up or backed out of the work that no longer suited me.

What was wrong with that?

He pointed out that not only was I clearly suffering emotionally when I felt overwhelmed, but I was hurting my professional credibility as well.

He told me I had a time management problem.  I argued I had an over-commitment problem.

Over time, I realized he was right.  And the problem was far worse than I realized.

Fortunately, I discovered a process that, with just one day of concentrated effort, allowed me to take control of my calendar, break my enthusiastic tendencies to over-commit, and finally (finally!) let me feel in control.

Today I’ll show you step-by-step how I did it.

You want to take a break. No, you need a break.

But you don’t take one.

You’re worried you’ll be seen as irresponsible, unreliable, or selfish.  You keep saying, “Things will slow down in a couple of weeks and then I’ll schedule some time off.”

Two weeks go by.  Then two months.  And the tasks just keep coming.

When I said I wanted to be a writer, I did not mean a writer of to-do lists. 

Sometimes I’m tempted to curl up with a cat and not get out of bed until I’m too hungry to lie there anymore (which, for those who don’t know me, is about 15 minutes).

Sometimes when I sigh particularly loudly and my daughter asks me what’s wrong, I don’t know what to tell her because actually, everything is freaking amazing in my life right now.

It’s just that, sometimes, I want to cry from exhaustion.

And I’m pretty sure I’m not alone.  People often tell me they feel so overwhelmed, they’re paralyzed.  They don’t have the emotional energy for dinner, much less career change.  The best they can muster is some down time in front of the TV or computer, but it’s not relaxing and strangely not satisfying.

The writer in me would like to give you 5 simple steps to solve your problem.  But let’s face it, ignorance is not the issue.

Nope, I’m not going to tell you what to do.  I’m going to do one better: I’m going to show you.  Even if it hurts.

I’m currently experiencing a lot of changes in my life: leaving the military, selling my beloved house, moving to another state, and looking for new job.  Needless to say, life is hectic.  It feels like one big to-do list, and few of the tasks are real pleasures.

Even outside that kind of change, modern life seems obsessed with project management and getting things done.  Consider blogs such as Stepcase Lifehack and Simple Productivity.  Amazon offers scads of books on everything from getting organized to overcoming procrastination.

So when I got the following “letter turned guest post” from Everyday Bright reader and fellow Brazen Careerist Sadya Siddiqui, I knew I had to share it.  In my opinion, it’s nothing short of brilliant.